Some days I’m so good with myself.

“You’re being absolutely ridiculous.”

“That’s never going to happen.”

And I carry on with my day.

At the moment those days seem few and far between.

Anxiety and reality are in a constant battle. Everything around you is telling you that everything is fine. Your friends, family, your environment. Everything is fine.

……so why am I panicking.

Because anxiety is speeding towards reality with guns blazing. Nothing is fine. You’re in real danger, anxiety screams. Run.

Anxiety tears you in half inside. Mental torture. You know everything’s fine. You know it. But what if it’s not? Something is telling me it’s not.

Your brain is working overtime over the simplest of things. Stepping outside. Making a drink. Watching a film. Basic activities are made into unachievable goals whilst the war continues in your head.

And that. That. Is why I’m exhausted.